Me on: What kind of people attract me.

This might seem senseless and dumb to some, as well as other posts I will write the next 30 days. But I need to discover myself again, because I feel like I lost sight of what I am. Just as if I was writing a long book and suddenly forgot what I was doing, and when I try to read what I wrote in the past, I can't read, it's written in another language. It feels as if I forgot how to read. So I want to use writing as a way to rediscover my insides. Let's see if it works. I will ramble around and hope you people understand how I feel and perceive the world.

No one reads this anyways.

Now I'm going to talk about the magnetic attraction, or in other words the kind of people that attract me.

I am bisexual. I have always been. I can remember I used to kiss a girl I played with when I was a child, and I still see her walking around, sometimes with her boyfriend. I used to kiss boys too, and I fell in love with some on the way. However, I have always had a strong preference towards girls, I think it's easier to find attractive girls than men, at least the ones that fit my taste.

I get easily hunted by beautiful women. I've met the perfect woman a thousand times. But I guess that's just the glass through which I see, because none of them seems to be charmed by me. I've fallen in love with many, but I know they won't ever fall for me, because I'm just too awkward for people. I like colorful hair and flowers growing inside their skulls. And I know a couple people who are just like that, but for some reason they are spending their time inside the wrong underwear. I love tiny skinny girls I can hold inside my arms, like they're so fragile they could break if I don't hold them close. I like girls who use makeup in a way that reflects their personality, using crazy colors on their lips, and almost talking about themselves without even opening their mouths.

I love strong and deep voices in men. Built up bodies and long hair are also very appreciated (lol). Also, a badass attitude without leaving chivalry behind. I like to be treated like a friend, but still, like a princess. I like men who know how to treat others with respect without being too tender.

I like artists specially. Someone who makes art is someone who has a young but wise soul, and I'm definitely attracted to that. I'm very protective though I'm a very bad influence too, so I like people with open minds and warm hearts. I look for someone who isn't afraid of dying, a wild heart that flies against the wind, that acts even against everyone's will.

Everyone calls me beautiful, but no one will kiss me with honesty, no one really has time to see what I have to offer as a human being. I'm not really compatible with anyone I know to this day. I'm not asking for a date with this. I just want to take all this out somehow, and talking (or writing, in this case) helps a lot. I guess some people will think this is negative. But remaining positive doesn't mean that you won't see the dark side of every situation, for me it means that  after all, you wake up everyday to look for new possibilities, knowing your weakness, remaining strong. This is the way I explore my feelings in order to fix them. I want love, even knowing it will always be temporary, I'd like to feel enough attraction to someone so that maybe at some point we could love each other. But it's just a thought. One that walks around my head most of the time. I'm too honest when I write about myself, and I suppose some people will feel like me, and that's also good. Now you know you're not the only one.

Abril Rouge